EUROPEAN VACATIONS CENTRAL

When going on European vacations, it’s very beneficial to study up on the customs and manners of the countries you are visiting.  Understanding and being able to conform to the local social conventions separates you from the tourists who are harvested like cash crops and given the commercial courtesies that only money can buy.  Knowing and applying local social customs shows your respect for your host country and opens many doors that the average tourist never enters. But best of all, it makes your European vacation more fun and makes you look smart.

One of the best European vacations I ever took was to Portugal. Before leaving on my European trip, I had thoroughly studied the Portuguese way of doing things.  When I arrived I found the Portuguese people to be friendly, courteous, helpful and hospitable.  I continually delighted the Portuguese by applying the social principles I learned and was rewarded by gaining great rapport with most of the Portuguese we encountered.

 My wife and I were exploring the Minho district. The Minho district is my favorite part of Portugal: it is very green, medieval and not nearly as touristy as the more publicized Algarve in Southern Portugal. As we drove we gazed at heather-covered hills, green pastures, lush forests filled with cedars and chestnuts, poplar shaded river valleys, fishing villages, and medieval ramparts that contained foreboding castles and quaint cobble stoned villages. Street scenes included men in berets on village squares watching the world go by, men in cafes enthusiastically discussing political and philosophical issues while women in black shawls gossiped in doorways.

One of my favorite European vacation experiences happened at a little hotel we stayed at for 3 nights in the Minho. We had only intended to stay there one night, but we were having such a great time we extended our stay. The service was formal, yet very cordial. We delighted the Maitre D’ by ordering the local specialties he recommended and complimented him on how much we enjoyed them. In return we always received a complimentary little treat with our dessert. When given recommendations on what to see by the concierge, we always told him how much we enjoyed his recommendations and how beautiful and interesting his suggestions were and why we liked them (which was true).

 One night we had invited an American couple we met to dine with us at the hotel. After dinner we retired to the lounge overlooking the river that separated the village from Spain. As we were sitting in our thick leather chairs admiring the view and waiting to order, the Maitre D’ came over with a large snifter of my favorite Portuguese brandy, whirled it around majestically, placed it ceremonious in front of me and asked: “What would the rest of you like to drink?” I felt like the lord of the manor!

When we regretfully checked out of this haven, every member of the staff stood in line at the door and shook our hand as we left. To their surprise, as I walked down the line I had an envelop containing the appropriate tip for each staff member in the line. This was a Portuguese custom I learned about but few tourists are aware of.  They really appreciated the gesture.

10 Helpful Tips on Portuguese Customs and Manners

The Portuguese are wonderful people but are generally reserved and polite. Their social manners tend to be elaborate, especially in forms of address. To the Portuguese, their nation is a place they truly love so always speak of it in complimentary ways.

It should be noted now that Portugal has become part of the European Community many of its older traditions are fading especially with the younger generation.  However, if you are socializing with an older or more conservative crowd following the guidelines below will minimally help you avoid awkward situations and at best make you appear well cultured.  

1. Men should rise when they are introduced, women stay seated.
2. When introduced to some one, shake hands. If you are meeting a group of people shake hands with each one.
3. Use a person’s professional title before the last name if addressing a doctor, lawyer, professor or engineer.
4. Good topics of conversation are the beauty of Portugal, vacations, wines, hobbies, you and your host’s families
5. Topics to avoid include financial issues such as salaries, cost of living or personal questions about some one’s job.
6. People tend to dress more formally in Portugal than in the U.S., even for casual occasions. Unless explicitly directed otherwise or know your hosts habits very well, when invited to dinner men should wear a coat and tie, women should wear a dress. When you get there, it’s always easier to dress down than finds ways to make your attire more formal.
7. Don’t start eating each course until everyone has been served.
8. Never eat with your hands unless your host does. Even fruit should be eaten with a knife and fork.
9. You’ll be pressed strongly to take second helpings. Take very small portions the first time, since you will be expected to eat everything on your plate.
10. Keep your napkin in your lap; don’t tie it around your neck, even when eating messy dishes such as lobster. Before leaving the table, fold your napkin.

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